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Yikes, what is going on with me? What is this reluctance I feel? Is it fear?
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Yup, fear is it. Your series of questions following it seem to indicate largely a fear of the unknown. That's the worst kind of fear out there.
When I came across this forum and the 'laundry list', my next therapy appointment, I took the list with me (printed it out), handed it to my therapist and said "Pick one, and let's get to work".
I calmed my fears by taking action. It's easier to be afraid into inaction, but once you start moving in a direction - any direction - some of that fear begins to go away. Especially if you have a good therapist.
I do relate to that feeling of "inner child has become unmanageable". I found that feeling of being out of control to be much more anxiety provoking than the fear of rehashing old stuff from my childhood.
Although your relationship with your parents is different now, that doesn't mean that your past didn't exist and didn't have a major impact on you as an adult. If you can work with it as dealing with how your past life affects your current life, perhaps some of the fear of the unknown will let up a bit.
Welcome to the board. Someone else should be along shortly to give their perspective on it.