Hello,
As a wise person here once said to me......
"We know how much it hurts. Please try to remember that he is ill, and that his behavior has nothing to do with you. He is no longer "choosing" the way you or I do. Don't let your self-esteem suffer because of this. It's going to take a soul-level earthquake to put him on the right path."
I know it hurts. I know it feels like he has chosen crack over you, but he didn't. He is sick and incapable of making that kind of decision. We are here for you, remember to be kind to yourself through these hard times.