SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information - View Single Post

shutterbug · 11-24-2006, 07:34 PM

well probably because you put more of yourself into the relationship than you had to give....so now you are drained emotionally and those 2 dates remind you of the loss of something you had envisioned as great.

A good thing you could do is pre-plan some fun activities for yourself on these 2 days each month. Do things that will make you feel good about yourself or just make you feel good inside...this can even be spending time with family or friends that make you happy.

From this point on start turning ALL of those feelings of desire for him/her back onto yourself with a mission of living life to the fullest and happiest and start living for YOU!

We all have to learn to love ourselves before anyone else can truely love us the way we deserve (thanks for reminding me of this today...I needed it)....this helps me put taking care of myself into perpective and put my future lovelife and happiness into my own hands rather than just waiting for someone to come along to make me whole. Because no one can - except me and God.

Giant Hugs,
Jenna

p.s. If no one has suggested it yet....I think you would enjoy reading "Codependency No More" by Melanie Beattie (sp?). I put it off for a long time, but was finally glad I read it once I got around to it. It can help put a lot of things about relationships into perspective in situations like these.

11-24-2006, 07:34 PM	#2 (permalink)
shutterbug A picture's worth a 1000 words Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: With any luck, I'm lost in a view finder Posts: 2,947 Blog Entries: 5	well probably because you put more of yourself into the relationship than you had to give....so now you are drained emotionally and those 2 dates remind you of the loss of something you had envisioned as great. A good thing you could do is pre-plan some fun activities for yourself on these 2 days each month. Do things that will make you feel good about yourself or just make you feel good inside...this can even be spending time with family or friends that make you happy. From this point on start turning ALL of those feelings of desire for him/her back onto yourself with a mission of living life to the fullest and happiest and start living for YOU! We all have to learn to love ourselves before anyone else can truely love us the way we deserve (thanks for reminding me of this today...I needed it)....this helps me put taking care of myself into perpective and put my future lovelife and happiness into my own hands rather than just waiting for someone to come along to make me whole. Because no one can - except me and God. Giant Hugs, Jenna p.s. If no one has suggested it yet....I think you would enjoy reading "Codependency No More" by Melanie Beattie (sp?). I put it off for a long time, but was finally glad I read it once I got around to it. It can help put a lot of things about relationships into perspective in situations like these. __________________ I'M FINE!! Fanatically Insecure Neuratic & Emotional Bipolar/Depression support: 1-800-950-NAMI(6264).