August 11th
My parents played a huge part in my choice to become eating-disordered. It has been hard not to blame them entirely for all the bad things in my life.
I have learned that hanging on to resentment toward my parents has only hurt me. I worked through my anger at my mom and dad for the hurts they caused, but to stay stuck in that anger would be costly. I am now trying to let go of my anger toward my parents.
It is hard to get past being angry at them, but I have to face my responsibility. I can choose to remain unhealthy, blaming my parents for the way I am, or I can make new choices for my life. There comes a time when I can no longer blame my past, as ugly as it is, for my present condition.
Today I am a parent, and I am painfully aware of how easy it it to make mistakes with children! This perspective helps me give my parents a degree of honor for the job they did parenting me, even though it was not perfect.