Everyone wants to believe themselves to be authentic. We are like the Velveteen Rabbit, who only wanted to be real, which meant to be loved. It does not seem possible that anyone would cherish the idea of being false or unreal. But are we? It seems that many who are in recovery from addictions are self-deceived. Perhaps it goes beyond that, as is believed by a great number of people, to a social construct that creates mass deception on a large scale. In an election year, there are many who believe that politicians are marketers of the snake oil of social distortion and indiscriminant dishonesty. Are we capable of being authentic in such an environment?

While truth can be variable and changing, as is the Universe we inhabit, authenticity is a principle that goes beyond truth to the core of each one of us. We can be authentic from within ourselves by knowing who we are and what we will and will not stand for. Our authentic nature will then come from the stance we take in our personal lives. Do we know ourselves? This is a process that never seems to have an ending point, but do we “walk our talk” as the saying in 12-step groups goes? Are we willing to be unpopular for not going along with the crowd when it does not feel right for us? Do we have the moral fiber to be completely honest with ourselves, the inner circle of friends and family, and let the pieces fall where they may when it does not fit with the majority opinion?

Authenticity does not mean that we fly in the face of opposition or become defensive about our beliefs. More, it means that we honor them by NOT becoming boisterous or argumentative about them. We do not need to publish them in our personal blog or on Facebook to let the world know. Authenticity is quiet and understated, as a principle. It is a quality that does not need to be broadcast. It means that we walk through the world according to the moral and ethical values that lie in our hearts, not our heads. We live what we believe and let the world around us see and watch our behaviors and attitudes become actions that are directly in line with what we believe.

If we state that we are in favor of an idea or belief, we need to behave in ways that show the world what we believe. They do not hear our words when our actions are in direct conflict with them. The old saying, “Actions speak louder than words” is quite true. The world will judge us on what we do, not what we say. So we must align our actions and behaviors with our beliefs to develop true authenticity.

We also must learn to remain honest with others in our day to day interactions with them. If we are being less than forthcoming about something, others are sure to pick up on our dishonorable words and behaviors. If you are going to tell someone that they are important to you, be sure to show them in your behaviors and actions. It will not be authentic if they know you are saying things to placate or get something over on them. An authentic person is kind enough to be honest with others, even when it is difficult. A true friend will let someone know when they are unhappy with or disinterested in them. While it may not be the best news, it will always be the truth, and therefore, authentic.

Kelly McClanahan has an MSW in clinical social work, with a specialization in substance abuse treatment. Having worked in this field for over 20 years, she is currently working on her certification as an addictions’ counselor.

A great skill to develop for maintaining ongoing recovery and manifesting goals is knowing how to effectively manage one’s time. Early in recovery, it is enough to do what is suggested by a sponsor, the needs of recovery being placed in top priority. Once recovery has been comfortably established, recovering addicts often find time to rediscovered or develop goals and dreams that had lay dormant and unheeded during their addiction.

As dreams surface, it is important for addicts to learn how to balance their time effectively so they can achieve these goals. This is a good time to learn coping skills for dealing with stressors that are introduced as they advance toward these goals. If they desire career advancement, it may mean that they will undergo an educational process that will allow them to do so. If they are looking for relationships that can enhance their recovery experience, they may decide to date, to get married, to have children, or step into whatever new role desired. If a hobby is desired, one might enroll into an art class or music lessons.

Finding time to increase their social life or take on new responsibilities can upset the balance they had achieved during the early stages of their recovery. Whatever changes they desire to make in their lives, or whatever changes occur that they need to incorporate into their schedules, it is important that the recovery meetings, time with recovering friends, sponsorship and other recovering activities not be compromised.

A easy way to plan to incorporate changes in their schedules is to use a simple pie chart. Drawing a large circle, divide the circle into 24 even slices. These slices represent hours of any given day. Begin by selecting seven or eight slices for the necessary time required for sleep. This is a big key for everyone’s recovery, since lack of sleep can be a trigger for those old habits that remind the addict of their previous lifestyle. Then select the appropriate number of slices to represent their daily work activities, grooming time, and commuting time both to and from their normal activities. Allow slices to represent their recovery activities, such as meetings, sponsorship time, and phone calls made and received to support recovery. This will leave a few of those slices for time with family, children, parents, etc.

Kelly McClanahan has an MSW in clinical social work, with a specialization in substance abuse treatment. Having worked in this field for over 20 years, she is currently working on her certification as an addictions’ counselor.

There are more than 700 NY treatment centers within a 50-mile radius of downtown Manhattan which includes sober living environments, in-patient treatment and out-patient treatment centers, along with many detox facilities and others.

Addicts in New York have a great deal of opportunity to find treatment that is specifically suited to their lifestyles, particular addictions, and religious beliefs, perhaps their sexual identification. Programs are available for those who espouse Christian, Jewish, Buddhist and other religious preferences. There are programs for women with children, addicts with co-occurring mental diagnoses, men or women only, and LGBT populations. Long or short-term, from two weeks to a year, for inpatient or outpatient treatment is available. There are component programs, where an addict may go into a detox process for two weeks, remain in residential (inpatient) treatment for a stabilizing period of two weeks to two months, then remain for outpatient treatment for up to two years, while residing in either private housing, or going to a sober living environment. All of these options are predicated on both insurance benefits available and/or financial wherewithal.

One benefit of going to treatment in New York City is the availability of options for programs and preference for types of treatment. These range from $150.00 per day to $10,000.00 per day, for residential treatment. They include every type of dietary need, medical need, lifestyle option, and numerous other factors. Some offer different types of therapy and frequency of sessions, yoga classes, singing, chanting, religious rites, animal therapy (such as equine therapy), ropes’ courses, alternative dietary regimens, spiritual rites (such as Native American sweat lodges), meditation, and others. While these may all be available at treatment centers in other parts of the world, the variety seems largest in this city.

In a list of more than 500 treatment programs in a 50-mile radius centered in Los Angeles, more than 60 of treatment centers are in Los Angeles itself. This can be misleading, because, unlike other large cities in the United States, the city of Los Angeles is a hard location to pinpoint. It spreads out into other locations and other areas, looking more like a multilegged spider than a metropolis. If you spread the search out to 100 miles around the center of Los Angeles, there are more than 600 treatment programs listed.

Given that many treatment programs in such a small area, what could some of the differences be? Well, for starters, Southern California is known for several things: ideal weather most of the year, beaches, movie stars and fancy cars and other stereotypes of the California lifestyle. Along with those images come those of the movie, TV and music personalities who become famous (infamous?) for their lives of excess and embarrassing publicity around that excess.

It seems that many of them will land in California treatment programs at one time or another. The number of high-end centers in Malibu is around 12. However, most in the treatment field know there are others. Some private, exclusive agencies do not advertise or list themselves anywhere. These are usually the places for the celebrity crowd or elite.

For the rest of the crowd, treatment may run the gamut of low-income, subsidized beds in residential centers such as the Salvation Army in inner cities across the country to private rooms and board in the high-end facilities catering to the very wealthy and private at $90,000.00 per month. There are inpatient, residential services for those who have the means or the insurance package to cover these services and outpatient, either intensive or not, for the same crowds. Others may find help in the downtown Los Angeles mission district, where soup kitchens and homeless services are offered to those who are less fortunate and without other resources.

Many people come to California from other parts of the country for various reasons. Most often, the weather is an incentive, and the same is true for rehab. Why spend the winter in a cold, snowy climate in winter when rehab is the plan for a month or two? For a bit more travel money, a nice climate change to Los Angeles beach areas or Palm Springs can be a great break in the routine. This is especially true when the routine is one of cycling through the ravages of drug and/or alcohol addiction.

Beginning in the 1980s, Southern California became a mecca for treatment seekers with the opening of a treatment program in the Palm Springs area run by the wife of a former president whose public recovery from addiction to pain pills was front-page headline news. Always a popular spot for vacationers and retirement, Southern California offers a wide variety of treatment and an array of programs serving everyone.

A successful road to recovery can be a challenging path when one is looking to find a good fit that isn’t part of the 12-Step process. Here are a few  organizations that offer alternative recovery options:

LifeRing, www.lifering.org. Begun in 1999, this group provides secular self-help for abstinence from drugs and alcohol. The philosophy is one of the “3S”: 1. Sobriety, 2. Secularity, 3. Self-help.

Moderation Management, www.moderation.org. This group began in 1993, providing peer support for reduction of drinking-either to lower levels or total abstinence. They state they provide (but do not say how) a variety of behavioral change guidelines and measures for success. They offer 9 Steps Toward Moderation and Positive Lifestyle Change.

SMART Recovery®, www.smartrecovery.org. SMART=Self-Management and Recovery Training groups teach tools for recovery based on research. They state that they provide a 4-point program: 1. Building and Maintaining Motivation; 2. Coping with Urges; 3. Managing Thoughts, Feelings & Behaviors; 4. Living a Balanced Life. Incorporating the treatment tool of Stages of Change with several of the worksheets from that book, they also have many other types of worksheets and what appear to be lectures. Most of the material is located on the website.

Secular Organizations for Sobriety/Save Ourselves, www.sossobriety.org. This group is also non-affiliated with a Higher Power concept and empowers the individual to recover from addiction. They offer 6 guidelines to follow for responsible recovery and abstinence.

Women for Sobriety, www.womenforsobriety.org. This is a for-women-only sobriety group which 1976. They offer a “New Life” program with 13 statements, instead of 12 steps.

While they all appear to eschew both a 12-step format and a Higher Power concept, they all include at least several bullet-point terms to change of behaviors linked to active addiction. A couple of these also include instructional manuals for learning to become a group leader. The more structured of these programs sometimes need to find a group with trained leaders in order to become a new group, taking someone from the group to the new one as their leader or becoming adept at running a gathering by being trained.

Support groups provide a safe haven for those who seek abstinence as a way of life. Just as they had a group with whom they enjoyed the conviviality of drinking/drugging, the companionship and caring of a group of people traveling the path of recovery is important for success.